Feeling nurtured with self-compassion

“Self compassion is nurturing yourself with all the kindness and love you would shower on someone you cherish”.

-Debra Reble

Picture how you interact with a close friend or much-loved family member. You listen when they need support, you remind them to take breaks and not work so hard, and you're a kind voice when they're hard on themselves. You most likely remind that friend of who they are when life feels discouraging, and you probably have a sense of humour around their quirks and human flaws.
Today's reflection:

Are you compassionate with your own imperfections, mistakes, and hard times? Today you’re invited to practice being gentle with yourself, and to notice what your habitual response to difficulty is. This week, set a reminder on your phone for midday. Pause for a minute and recall what your thoughts were when an issue or difficulty came up that morning. Were you hard on yourself? Were you compassionate or forgiving?  

"Where do you get into the trance of unworthiness, of not okay?" -Tara Brach

3 ways to build self-compassion:

❣Start the day with 1 self-appreciation. Think of a personal quality you respect or feel proud of in yourself. Say it out loud, and smile as you do it! This helps in really celebrating and owning what you've said. 

❣After a busy day, re-fill your love bank. Recall something in your day that was uncomfortable or disappointing, and acknowledge how you felt. Give yourself a hug and let the earlier disappointment melt away. 

❣Make a kindness list. Write down all the kindness and care you show loved ones. Be specific in saying what actions you take. Spend 5-10 minutes writing, then circle 2 things you could do to help you feel more okay during a hard week. This helps give you permission to show yourself TLC in ways you might not have thought about. 

Here is a 10-minute self-compassion meditation with Tara Brach, one of my favourite meditation teachers. Get comfortable and enjoy listening 💛

https://www.tarabrach.com/meditation-the-rain-of-self-compassion/

Karyn Davies, Registered Clinical Counsellor

Karyn empowers clients to live with passion, authenticity, and trust. Her support enhances self-esteem and promotes a regular self-care practice, while celebrating client progress in feeling more grounded, capable, and present to life's joys and challenges. 

www.evokemedicine.com/karyn-davies-rcc

www.refreshcounsellingvancouver.com

Balancing time for loved ones AND self

What does a typical week look like for you? You may find yourself feeling really busy,
running from work to errands and back home to take care of your kids or get the house in order. Between the demands of staying in touch with family and friends, pursuing career dreams, and trying to stay active in your hobbies, life can begin to stretch you in what feels like too many directions! Here is your invitation: Get clear on what energizes you, and nurture that more. (As much as you possibly can!)

    1. Make a list of everything you normally do in a week. Put a star beside the activities that bring you joy or inspiration. Those are your happy grooves:) Hint: that is when you feel the most relaxed, fulfilled, and  glad to be alive.
    2. Pick 3 happy groove things you can do on a more regular basis, such as taking your time (not rushing) when getting from 1 activity to another.
    3. Commit to doing something uplifting EVERY DAY
    4. Pour loving thoughts into your new commitment  (one happy groove thing each day).

Create a balance between respecting your own needs and showing love to your people ❤        This balance acknowledges that your loved ones are super important to you, and ALSO remembers that your energy reserves need refilling on a regular basis. It is not selfish or indulgent to fill your own cup.. in fact, it's vital to having healthy, beautiful connections!
The more you get in tune with what recharges your batteries, the more you will feel able to have meaningful conversations and spend quality time with your loved ones. You'll have greater reserves of patience, generosity, and positive energy to draw upon.

Shaking off self-doubt & embracing freedom

The mind can get busy with thoughts about not being enough- smart, confident, articulate enough. Worries about being too much can also feed self-doubt- that you may at times be overly bold, needy of attention, or filled with ambition.
Whatever your form of self-doubt might be, today I invite you to focus on how you’ve progressed and grown this last while. 
What skills and personal qualities are growing in you? Authenticity ... Trust ... sense of humour ... honesty ... perseverance ...
Grab some paper or your laptop and take a few minutes to write down at least 3 things you have accomplished in any area of your life. Start small! Remember to be as specific as you can, as details will help you really start to appreciate your victories:)

Curiosity opens doors

I find that curiosity is a remarkable quality in humans. Since childhood, how often do you allow yourself to dwell in curiosity; to simply take a moment to marvel at something in nature, or to spend unrestricted time exploring and really getting into an activity you enjoy?

Let yourself open to being curious.

What is sparking your curiosity these days? Maybe you're looking back with a sense of wonder at choices you made this year; or you're seeing how far you've come in your relationships and career. It may be that you've wanted to take up pottery or dance, or become part of a book club to open your reading horizons.

Staying curious is a fabulous way to keep your heart open to new possibilities- to aspects of yourself and life that you may not have gotten to fully appreciate yet.
In my work with clients, one of the things I can help you with is being present-and curious about what is happening within your inner world, as well as navigating everyday life in a way that is more in tune with who you are.